(Last updated 8th August 2022) Do you like sex? It’s a part of human nature, and it’s normal to want to have sex in your dreams.
Learn how to get lucid and get shagging!
In fact, one of the most common reasons people learn to lucid dream, is to have lucid dream sex!
They want to experience something maybe a little unusual, or they just want to experience a sexual fantasy. I’m going to explain a little bit about how it works, how to do it, and some other things as well.
People have sexual experiences in a lucid dream for a number of reasons:
- You can always have sex whenever you want in a dream
- You can have sex with whoever you want, dead, alive celebrity, friend etc
- You don’t need to ask their permission! (It’s in a dream, after all)
- You can explore fantasies with no risks
- There’s no risk of getting anyone pregnant, or getting STIS!
- There’s no risk of anything!
How to have real lucid dream sex
Having sex in a lucid dream requires you to have a couple of things before you start…
- A basic level of dream ‘control’ (I’ve covered how to lucid dream easily before)
- Being able to actually remember your dreams
If you can’t remember your dreams, you might not remember that awesome sexual experience in the morning! To get started, make sure you can actually control your dreams, and you know how to remember them every morning. If you don’t know how to lucid dream yet or how to recall your dreams, learn that first, then come back here!
Step 1: Become lucid in the dream
Make sure to do a reality check as soon as you’re in the dream. In fact, a really great technique to try is the cycle adjustment method, it works really effectively especially for beginners.
You might find it useful to do a wake back to bed to enter the lucid dream, or you could use a technique of your choice. Make sure it’s something that works well for you. That’s why this is better if you’ve lucid dreamt before. The more practice yo’ve had with lucid dreams, the better because it means you can just focus on the sex part!
Step 2: Find a dream character you want to have sex with
Look around for someone you like. It can be anyone, as they’re all inside your head. They’re all dream characters created by your brain.
When looking for someone, you can ask the dream to provide someone for you. For example, you could say ‘I want to have sex with xxxxx’ and they will appear if you expect them to.
Expectation is everything and so what you expect to happen, will. If you have doubts, for example that the person will run away, then they probably will! Just be confident and expect that they’ll want to make love to you!
Click one of the sharing buttons below to see the last steps and the description of WHAT lucid sex feels like, it takes a second and the content will instantly appear on this page!
Step 3: Make the move!
Make sure you’re stable in your dream and you’ve done your reality checks. Now, approach the dream character and proceed to touch them and have sex with them. They will more than likely just do whatever you want them to, because after all they’re just parts of your own mind.
This part should come fairly naturally, as you’re just coming onto the person as you would in real life. You can start by kissing them, rubbing their body or gently stroking their hair, but be warned. The more time you spend on foreplay and leading up to the sex, the more likely it is you’ll wake up first!
Lucid dreams are fickle things and if you get too excited, you’ll wake up! You don’t want that, especially not before you’ve had your ‘moment’ so make sure you’re not too excited! Enjoy the moment but don’t focus too much on it or you’ll wake yourself up!
Step 4: Having an orgasm
You’ll find that pretty quickly, you’ll feel like you’re about to cum or have an orgasm. This is normal but be aware that as this happens, you’ll likely wake yourself up. There isn’t really anything to say for this step as it just sort of ‘happens’
The importance of expectation!
This is an important thing to consider. Whatever you EXPECT to happen in a lucid dream, is what will happen. If you expect to be rejected sexually, then you will be, even in your dreams. You need to see yourself doing the thing you want to be doing (no pun intended) before you can!
Really believe in yourself, and expect the dream characters to go along with your sexual desires.
How sex works in lucid dreams
In a dream, your mind creates and experiences the world, which means that what you experience is mainly affected by what you’re thinking, and the things you’ve already seen or done in real life. That means essentially, that lucid dream sex will be similar or better to real life sex.
Your brain creates how it thinks sex should feel if you’re a virgin, so don’t worry if you haven’t had real life sex, in a dream it will still feel incredible. Usually however, the dream will give you a sexual experience much like what you’re had in waking life.
It can amplify certain bits however. So if you concentrate on making the feeling last longer, it will. You have a remarkable level of control over how it feels, BUT not as much control over how long it lasts.
Because you’re doing something very engaging and exciting, like anything exciting that you do in a lucid dream, it has a high chance of waking you up. Specially if you’re not very experienced.
FAQ and tips/tricks
Here are some questions which I’ve been asked by some of my readers about Lucid Dreaming sex. I’ll answer them again here for you to see. You can feel free to skim read if you like, I’ll just answer as many common questions as I can!
What does lucid dreaming sex actually feel like?
It feels amazing. It will be a mixture of your memory of real life sex, and how you expect it to be. If you EXPECT it to feel incredible every second, then it will. It’s all in your mind, remember?
It feels amazing when you’re actually doing it, and while you’re in the dream it feels just as good as real life sex, if not better! Just like how you can eat food in a lucid dream and it tastes almost better than real life, sex is a subjective thing and you can experience some powerful feelings having sex in a dream.
Your brain can simulate almost anything, remember. If you’ve ever had the desire to have hot sex with a policewoman or someone you know, you can! It will feel as good as you want it to, and you’re able to explore your desires in a risk free, safe environment.
Can you have REAL orgasms in a lucid dream?
You can actually experience REAL orgasms where you cum or ejaculate from a lucid dream, however this is a tricky subject.
It’s possible and has been proven that you can physically ejaculate from a lucid sex session, BUT the problem is most people make themselves too excited before they get to this stage. You need to be very focused and stable in the dream so that you don’t just wake yourself up!
Even if you don’t physically orgasm in real life, you’ll still wake up and feel like you have! You just might still be horny and need to have real sex when you wake up. To get there faster, make sure you go straight into the sex when you find a dream character that wants to, as any time you spend on foreplay just makes it more likely you’ll wake up!
Losing your virginity in a lucid dream?
What about losing your virginity? Well, I would argue that having sex in a dream which isn’t’ real, is NOT losing your virginity, as it’s not having physical sex. It’s not really even having emotional sex BEFORE you’ve physically done it for real.
Before you do it for real, you don’t really know what it feels like, and so your brain can only guess so much about the experience and feeling of it. After you’ve had real life sex, however, your brain is able to more accurately reproduce the feeling in a lucid dream experience.
Is dream sex dangerous?
Lucid Dreaming sex isn’t dangerous, in fact any lucid dreaming is totally safe. It’s nothing to worry about, and no harm can come to you by doing this. If you’re worried about ruining your relationship because of lucid sex, then don’t worry!
As we’ll cover in a minute, it’s not REALLY cheating, as it’s not real! The dream is a world inside your own head, although if you’re having frequent thoughts of WANTING to have sex with other people, then there might be a deeper problem that you need to look at! There are some annoying aspects of lucid sex that might put you off, however, such as:
- Getting stood up by dream characters
- Not being able to orgasm before waking up
- Being rejected by the dream character you choose to shag
- Not being able to remember to have sex in the dream
Is lucid sex real or fake?
Well, this entirely depends on you and what you think is real or not. If you have a sexual experience which you don’t like, don’t worry too much about it. Just try again the next night. You have plenty of time to practice this technique, and lucid dreaming is a lifetime journey, not just a one night stand (pun intended).
The actual sex itself, isn’t REALLY happening, it’s just a projection of what your mind thinks it would or will be like. That being said, you can actually orgasm with enough practice, so whether it’s fake or not depends on your beliefs. In that sense, it’s no different really from masturbation. You’re still potentially orgasming without another sexual partner.
Can lucid sex be scary?
Well, I don’t know what kind of sex you’re having, but most people don’t find it scary to have sex in a dream. It can be unexpected sometimes, for example if you’re having dream sex with someone you know, or someone you work with. You might be surprised by what happens when you try and have sex in a dream. It’s not scary though, or it shouldn’t be for most people.
If I have sex with someone in a dream, is that cheating?
Interesting question. I can only offer my personal opinion for this one, and that is that if someone intentionally finds someone other than their partner in a lucid dream (Where they’re in control) and has sex with them, then yes it’s cheating.
I wouldn’t say it’s the same as cheating in real life though. It’s all in your mind, so it’s really no different from simply imagining having sex with someone else, while you’re in a relationship. That being said, if someone got the point where they could achieve a physical orgasm from the lucid dream, you might want to talk it through with your partner.
When someone can actually physically orgasm in a lucid dream, it’s like they’re essentially masturbating over whoever they have sex with in the dream. Some relationships and some partners are NOT okay with that, so make sure you ask your partner!
How To Lucid Dream About Your Crush
So how can you dream about your crush or whoever you want to dream about? I will actually show you how to do this reliably on several nights, maybe even every night. So the first step, obviously, if you want to dream about your crush is to be able to dream, to be able to lucid dream.
Specifically, everybody dreams and everybody dreams several times a night. Actually, the only difference is, which ones do you remember? And that’s something you can work on.
That’s definitely something you can improve. And if you do want to improve your dream recall, I have a solution called the dream recall program. And it will show you very effectively, how to remember much more dreams in much more detail, but specifically, you need to be able to lucid dream.
So what are you going to do in order to dream about your crush or in order to lucid dream about them? You’re going to first set your intention, tell yourself, I’m going to dream about on a crush tonight, it’s going to happen and then visualize what things you will be saying or doing, right?
I’m not going to get too explicit with this, but try and visualize what things you’ll be doing or saying how it will feel, where you will be doing these things in what scenario on the beach, in a forest.
And now what you need to do is to visualize this person several times throughout the day, right up until the point when you fall asleep, and then when you’re falling asleep, that’s when it matters the most.
You need to really set a strong intention and tell yourself I will dream.
Or you could say ‘I will lucid dream about this person right now’, and then visualize again what you’ll be doing, how it will feel, and how much do you want this experience to happen?
I should specify:
You need to focus on the emotions, the feelings, and the sensations, and not so much the, like the specific things, focus on the feelings of it so that you really increase that desire and intention, because that’s really, what’s going to make you lucid dream. And that’s what’s going to bring that scenario into your lucid dream.
It’s the intention and the emotions.
It’s not really the specifics, because those things can change in a dream. And this certainly applies to, if you’re imagining talking to them, focus on the FEELING that you’ll get when you have the conversation and not the actual words, you’re going to say.
So, what will happen is you’ll become lucid.
And then, out of nowhere, this person, you know, your crash or whoever it is, will manifest themselves, they will appear in front of you. And then you’ll be able to have whichever experience you would like.
But again, you need to focus on the feelings and the emotions and not the specifics, because if you focus on this, focus on the specifics, you’ll get a blurry dream.
To recap, if you want to learn more about lucid dreaming, I made an entire video masterclass on YouTube. It’s about 15 or 20 minutes long.
It explains exactly how to lucid dream step by step reliably. It’s the best video I’ve made on YouTube so far.
If you want to just go straight to a step-by-step lucid dreaming course, I made one called the lucid breakthrough course.
And if you’re having trouble remembering your dreams, like if you’re having blurry or hazy dreams that can easily be fixed as well, I did make it a PDF kind of program that shows you how to do that.
It’s called the ‘dream recall program’.
Go and have lucid sex!
Now you know more about lucid dreaming sex, go and try it! It can feel amazing, and it’s one of the most common things that people do when they can control their dreams. It’s right up there with flying and climbing buildings.
If you enjoyed this article, please go ahead and share it with your friends! Also, if you’re not sure how to actually lucid dream, click here to check out my beginners guide! It will walk you through everything you need to know.